I have been feeling uninspired and far from God lately. Blah. Not my favorite time. Whatever the cause, I really feel like disconnecting from everything, but that is not the solution. When I was a newer Christian this type of feeling would make me doubt I believed or that any of my faith was real. Now I now that after almost 11 years of walking with God I know that sometimes this happens. And since I feel unable to really even express myself I will let David do it for me:
How long,O LORD? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me? How long must I wrestle with my thoughts and every day have sorrow in my heart? How long will my enemy triumph over me? Look on me and answer, O LORD my God. Give light to my eyes, or I will sleep in death; my enemy will say, “I have overcome him,” and my foes will rejoice when I fall. But I trust in your unfailing love; my heart rejoices in your salvation. I will sing to the LORD, for he has been good to me. Psalm 13
I have learned that while it can make life exciting to be an emotional person it can also make life scary. That is when I have to stand firm on the promises of God and on the finished work of Jesus. I will take David’s advice and “trust in his unfailing love” and not my failing love. I will rejoice in my salvation and wait for the feelings to come back. Some of Psalm 139:
Where shall I go from your Spirit?
Or where shall I flee from your presence?
If I ascend to heaven, you are there!
If I make my bed in Sheol, you are there!
If I take the wings of the morning
and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea,
even there your hand shall lead me,
and your right hand shall hold me.
If I say, “Surely the darkness shall cover me,
and the light about me be night,”
even the darkness is not dark to you;
the night is bright as the day,
for darkness is as light with you.
Search me, O God, and know my heart!
Try me and know my thoughts!
And see if there be any grievous way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting!
And listen to a Keith Green song: My Eyes Are Dry